finding meaning in the mundane

Tag: Parent

4 Reasons To Make Your Kids Cry

Owning up to the truth is always a good thing.  So today in an effort to be totally transparent with you guys, I must admit something.

There are times when I make my kids cry….

Kid Crying, TearsIt’s true.  This is a picture of my daughter taken on Monday of this week.  She looks really happy doesn’t she?  I think that being a good dad, or parent means that you are going to make your kids cry from time to time!

Here are 4 reasons why it’s good to make your kids cry.

1.  They are laughing so hard that they cry!

Parents-make your kids laugh, make them laugh hard!  Your house should be one of the most fun places that your children are at during their whole week!  Dad’s make sure that your stern disciplinarian side isn’t the only side of you that your kids see.  Play with them.  Get down on their level and just mess around.  Be silly. Use your silly voices.  Imagine with them.

2.  You pushed them out of the way of danger!

There are times when your scary voice comes out.  You know exactly which one I am talking about.  It is the one that when it is used everyone around knows you mean business.  There are times when it is appropriate to allow that voice to come out in order to protect your children from danger.  When my daughter Grace was careening out of control towards the street on her bike, the scary voice came out and scared her.  She cried.  I was trying to protect her from danger.  Parents protect your kids from danger, even if it means there will be tears because of it.

3.  You showed them a better way!

Kids will be kids.  They make mistakes.  They fall down and scrape their knees.  Sometimes their mistakes are willful.  Sometimes they are pushing the boundaries and testing you to see if you will help show them a better way.  In these moments lovingly guiding your child, teaching them that their is a better way can lead to tears.  Discipline is never fun, even for adults.  But it is so important to our children.  Parents do not be afraid to cause tears over matters that are significant.

4.  You are hugging them so tight that they can’t breath!

Okay Parents DON’T actually hug your kids so hard that they can’t breathe.  Parents DO– LOVE YOU KIDS so well that it is unmistakable.  Love them in a way that ensures that they know it.  Speak the love language of your kid.  (Gary Chapman wrote a great book on this topic: “The 5 Love Languages of Children“)  Whatever you do make sure that they know you love them.  This means more than just saying the words I LOVE YOU.  It means showing them that you love them.  Something my dad always said which has never left me was that you don’t spell love L-O-V-E.  You spell it T-I-M-E.  Love your kids well.

So, what things would you add to the list?  How have you made your kids cry?  Add to the list by leaving a comment or a thought below.


Scraped Knees= Shepherding Opportunities

Bleeding KneeMy kids have fallen down- many times.  In fact it happened recently.  Noah fell and scraped up his elbow pretty badly.  When we were trying to bandage it up he said, “IT BURNS LIKE LAVA!”  Ah to have the mind of a six year old again…

My kids have made mistakes.  They have written on walls, gotten pen on the couch, spilled milk, disobeyed, talked back, and been obstinate.  They have found that there is a whole lot of life that they want to explore and boundaries that they want to push.

These are the times as parents that are incredibly hard, right?  When your kid is in pain, pain so bad that it can only be likened to “burning like fire”, you want to take that away for them.  You wish that you could bear the pain on their behalf so that they didn’t have to feel it.  When I watch one of my kids fall, my whole body cringes, not because I am hurting, but because I know that they will be.

It is hard as a parent to watch and experience your children disobey, make poor decisions, and mistakes.  If you don’t believe me ask any parent of a teenager, they will tell you it is hard!

These are the moments when parenting is tough.

It is in these moments that parents have to step in and show their children that their is a better way.  There is a safer way to get from one side of the pool to the other than by running.  There is a reason why we don’t color with markers on the couch.  There is a reason why we eat over our plates.  All of this is for a reason.

When our children disobey, as parents we have to have the difficult discussion about why obedience is important.  We have to discuss why attitude is everything.  We have to talk about forgiveness.  We must teach our kids how to say sorry.  All of these things are important to teach lovingly and graciously to our children.

The Prophet Ezekiel

The Prophet Ezekiel by Michaelangelo

In the book of Ezekiel, God speaks through the prophet Ezekiel and tells his people that they haven’t been shepherding, or taking care of His people.  God reveals the condition of the shepherds heart as well as the condition of the flock.  Neither one is doing very well.

You eat the fat and clothe yourselves with the wool, you slaughter the fat sheep without feeding the flock. Those who are sickly you have not strengthened, the disease you have not healed, the broken you have not bound up, the scattered you have not brought back, nor have you sought for the lost; but with force and with severity you have dominated them.  They were scattered for lack of a shepherd, and they became food for every beast of the field and were scattered.

~Ezekiel 34:3-5

God speaks through Ezekiel and is trying to get the attention of those who are taking care of God’s flock, or God’s people.  This passage is challenging to me both as a parent and as a pastor.  It makes me ask the question, am I caring for the people that God has entrusted to me?

What about you? I don’t care if you are a pastor, or a parent.  A father, or a friend.  Are you lovingly guiding and caring for those that God has placed in your life?  How do you help your kids, friends, etc… know that you care?


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